Emptiness

So after this long journey I am finding peace and solitude which is unfamiliar to me since the early 80's even then I had 2 small children. I have found my way with an inner journey feeling comfortable and finally rewarding. I started a new exercise/food program beachbody fix which has been good making those moves that working on by myself far harder but now following a program for a half hour is easy well not easy but goes fast then keeping up my normal spin routine & kickboxing; running (not so good with cold weather& wind) It has been a definite transition for me but feels like the Angels did protect us from more possible doom due to the lack of snow & bad weather; general tourist not here. I do feel that the inner guidance is really a miracle that we have been taken care of. I only feel free for the last 2 weeks after doing taxes with good news. Since the last year was so challenging in so many ways I received paper work that I was sure I filed in appropriate place but getting it all together then not have some paper work from 1998 gathering that yahoo it was all a success. I also was really pondering about the Quest which was on the books for Aug. 2-9 just not feeling it for many reasons, plus with Joel's accident not having him available. I had asked Stacey if she was interested she had helped for 5 yrs when I had Danial Foor but she seemed to not hear me or just avoid the whole conversation. I absolutely need a team to pull off something as grand as that. Doing it with Daniel he always seems to enroll very enthusiastic people who he some how could really delegate to do the work. Last time we moved the lodge up from the river the new caretakers were concerned about fire, so called the forest service saying we had to move it. It was actually easier because it was more central not needing shifts of people to sit by it. I just slept there to keep it burning and make sure there was no problem. So the long and short I was up in the air about it since Xmas then after Joel's accident certainly another sign that it wasn't happening. I did have a dream that I was in a rather large room with many people the conversation came up about having a potluck and drumming type of camp out then the next day everyone go out on a day Quest. I posted it on Facebook got a great response which showed me it would be fun. Starting a new dialogue around an easier approach to a small Quest that I could do 1 a month, so with that gave me the sign to cancel the other which I did.
   I am doing Brene Brown's online course tomorrow I read her first book twice, until this week other then articles and various online documents I have not been driven to read so that changed too with the peace I am experiencing I am in deep gratitude for that. I am reading Daring Greatly which is inspiring me to think deeper, exactly where I am after this long workshop I call my life giving me guidance as to how my emotions sometimes work to get through the last drama. It is very good timing I am ready for it along with this new exercise program all very good timing opening up Pandora's box for me to delve into my own psychic reemergence feeling the power & getting guidance from my angels giving me drive. Realizing that this is the time I have been waiting for know that I need to have few distractions from what is birthing at this moment. I feel a drive to be around people who are exploring their own spiritual intellectual assistance to why we are here.  
    Getting back to some of my artist drive these are some of my bags I made to go with these drums, one for my son Zac & my grand-daughter Tessa, now making one for our newest addition Owen! Back to basics in this inward drive, diving deep!